Increasing your effectiveness with EFT, part 210. In almost any kind of relationship, whether romantic, family, friendship, or work related, it is common for certain dynamics to develop where two people repeatedly trigger each other. One person says or does something that touches a nerve in the other person. The second person reacts in a …
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Increasing your effectiveness with EFT, part 209. From time to time, I come across a question that sounds something like this: “No matter how much I tap, I feel resistance, like something inside me doesn’t want to let the emotion go”. This is actually more common than you might think. It can feel frustrating to …
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Increasing your effectiveness with EFT, part 208. Have you ever noticed yourself reacting strongly to something that, on the surface, seems minor? It might be a comment someone made, a mistake you made, a message that felt slightly off, or a small inconvenience during the day. Part of you might recognize that the reaction feels …
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Increasing your effectiveness with EFT, part 207. In a recent article, I wrote about how helpful it can be to give the microphone to anger while tapping. A similar approach can be applied to sadness. Sadness is often something we try to move away from. We distract ourselves, try to think differently, or look for …
Increasing your effectiveness with EFT, part 206. Earlier today, I was sharing with a client a way of approaching shame that can sometimes make it a bit more workable. Shame can be a very intense experience. It often shows up after we make a mistake, or when we remember something awkward or cringeworthy that we …
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Increasing your effectiveness with EFT, part 205. Recently, a client shared something that stayed with me. He told me that one of the things he appreciated about working with me was that I wasn’t asking him to do things he couldn’t actually do. He had experienced something different in other approaches. Being told things like …
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Increasing your effectiveness with EFT, part 204. One idea that stayed with me from my years studying psychology is the importance of “locating the loss” when we are going through grief. When we think about grief, we often associate it with the death of a loved one. But grief can also arise in many other …
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Increasing your effectiveness with EFT, part 203. Earlier today, I received an email from a client I had worked with a couple of years ago. Back then, we focused on the jealousy she felt toward her partner. Even though she knew, on a logical level, that he was trustworthy, the fear of being betrayed felt …
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Increasing your effectiveness with EFT, part 202. Whenever we experience a loss, failure, or disappointment, it can be difficult to keep that experience from affecting how we feel in the present and how we approach the future. This might involve the end of a relationship, a job or business that didn’t work out, or anything …
Increasing your effectiveness with EFT, part 201. From time to time, it can be surprisingly helpful to use EFT while simply letting ourselves vent. Not in the sense of spiraling into rumination, but in the sense of giving honest expression to the anger we might feel about someone else’s behavior. Many people feel uneasy about …