Increasing your effectiveness with EFT, part 16.
Have you ever felt like your EFT sessions ended a bit abruptly simply because you ran out of time? There are two main gentle ways to end an EFT session and they are called “Sneaking Away” and “The Safe Container Technique”. Today I’ll be talking about “Sneaking Away”.
“Sneaking Away” is best used when the overall unpleasant emotional intensity at the end of the session is lower than a 3 and/or your client’s nervous system is regulated and not in “survival mode”.
Basically, what you want to do when “Sneaking Away” is:
- Acknowledge that there might be more work to be done on whatever issue you worked on that day (you do this only while tapping on the side of the hand).
- Acknowledge and/or honor the work that was done during the session.
- Mention that it feels ok to end the session now and continue at a later time.
- Optionally: you can mention some of the “cognitive shifts” or signs of progress that the client experienced during the session.
So this is how it might sound like:
- Tapping on the side of the hand: “Even though there is more work to be done on my anxiety about public speaking, I want to acknowledge the work that I did today. And even though there is more work to be done on this, I feel ok putting this aside and ending the session now. And even though there is more work to be done on this, today I realized that if I make a mistake while speaking in that presentation, it’s not the end of the world, I can just correct the course as I go”.
- Top of the head: I want to acknowledge the work that I did today.
- Beginning of the eyebrow: I feel ok putting this aside for now.
- Side of the eye: I feel calmer than before.
- Under the eye: I’m not feeling so anxious when thinking about my upcoming presentation.
- Under the nose: I realized that if I make a mistake it’s not the end of the world.
- Chin: I can correct the course as I go.
- Collarbone: I really want to acknowledge the work that I did today.
- Under the arm: And I feel ok ending the session now.
So as you can see, as always when doing EFT, we want to make sure that all the words resonate and feel true to the client. That’s why, as usual, it’s best to use the client’s words as much as possible, especially when “bringing in the positives”. Try not to say something so positive that it doesn’t feel true to the client, such as “I feel completely happy right now”. Using your client’s words is a way to prevent that from happening.
During a session, whenever my client says anything positive, such as “I feel more relaxed now”, “I can feel a greater sense of self-compassion”, or “I understand now that we were just doing the best we could”, I make a note of that to maybe include it in the “Sneaking Away” round, if it feels appropriate.
Before you start “Sneaking Away”, you can also ask your client: “What would you say you got out of this session?”, and use some of those responses during the round.
So, in a nutshell, “Sneaking Away” is a gentle way to end the session when you notice that the overall emotional intensity at the moment is lower than a 3 and/or your client seems to be feeling pretty grounded and calm. It helps acknowledge that there is still more work to be done, and that it feels ok to put it aside for now while also acknowledging some of the progress that might have occurred during the session. When tapping on the rest of the points you stop referencing what is still unresolved, but instead focus more on the improvements that might have taken place and that it feels ok to end the session now.
That’s it for today. I hope this article was helpful to you. My name is Bruno Sade, and I’m a certified EFT practitioner with a mental health background as a clinical psychologist licensed in Argentina. I use EFT as a tool to help people (who speak English or Spanish) change their negative emotional reactions.
And, I’d love to know: do you tend to use “Sneaking Away” at the end of your EFT sessions? I’d love to know in the comments below.