Increasing your effectiveness with EFT, part 138.
When tapping on difficult emotions, it can sometimes feel overwhelming if we’re dealing with what seems like a whole period of time that was challenging or distressing. It’s common to have memories of long-term struggles, like a difficult school year or an uncomfortable work environment, and to feel as though these experiences are too broad to address all at once. Today, I’d like to talk about an effective way to use EFT in these situations—by breaking down these broader periods into smaller, manageable “scenes.”
Why Focus on Specific Scenes?
EFT works best when we’re able to tap on something specific. By focusing on a precise moment, emotion, or interaction, we create a clearer target for the tapping process, which helps bring up and release the emotional intensity. When we’re dealing with a period of time, like feeling isolated or anxious throughout school, the experience can feel too big to tap on directly. The solution? Treat it as if it were a movie of your life and ask yourself, “If I were watching this part of my life as a movie, what specific scenes stand out?”
Creating Your List of Scenes
You might find it helpful to look at this challenging period and identify a few moments that really stand out. Here are a few questions to guide you:
• Are there any specific situations where you remember feeling particularly uncomfortable or anxious?
• Was there a single event or comment that seemed to set the tone for this time in your life?
• Is there any scene, that even if it happened many times, is representative of that time period? (such as being alone during break time).
• What were some of the places, people, or interactions that brought up the strongest feelings?
For example, if you’re thinking about a period of isolation during school, you might identify scenes such as walking alone through the school hallways, noticing others socializing together, or a moment when a classmate said something humiliating in front of others.
Tapping on Individual Scenes
Once you’ve chosen a specific scene, you can begin tapping on the emotions or thoughts it brings up for you in the present moment. Let’s say you decide to tap on the scene of walking alone through the hallways. You might start with a phrase like, “Even though I feel sad when I remember walking down that hallway alone, seeing everyone else with friends, this is just where I’m at right now”.
Another example could be tapping on a memory of hearing an unkind comment from a peer, where you might say, “Even though I feel humiliated when I remember what they said, I feel this humiliation in my chest, and this is just where I’m at right now”.
Using Gentle Techniques for High-Intensity Memories
For memories that carry a very high emotional charge, it can be helpful to start with gentler techniques, like “Sneaking Up”, which involves “zooming out” and using fewer details and words. This can make it easier to approach intense memories without feeling overwhelmed. For instance, you could start with a phrase like, “Even though I feel sad just thinking about it, this is where I’m at right now”. This allows you to gently approach the memory without fully immersing yourself in every detail.
Aiming for Gradual Progress
Breaking down difficult periods into smaller scenes and addressing each one can make the process feel more manageable. Over time, this approach can help release layers of emotional intensity attached to each specific memory, eventually bringing relief to your overall experience of that time. And if some scenes feel too challenging to tackle alone, it can be beneficial to work with a practitioner who can guide you through the process.
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I’m Bruno Sade, a clinical psychologist and Certified Advanced EFT Practitioner. My approach is compassionate and tailored to your unique experiences and needs.
Have you ever tried working on long-term emotional experiences by breaking them down into smaller scenes? I’d love to hear about your experiences. If you’ve never tapped with me and would like to explore this approach further, feel free to reach out—I’d be happy to help.
If you’d like to experience a free EFT Tapping session in exchange for a brief market research interview, click here.