Balancing Emotion in EFT: Avoiding Overwhelm and Disconnection

Increasing your effectiveness with EFT, part 101.

In EFT practice, two common challenges often arise: difficulty in connecting with emotions and managing overwhelming emotional intensity. Let’s explore how to navigate these challenges effectively.

The first challenge is when a person finds it hard to connect to the emotion or feeling they want to release. As we’ve talked about before, EFT works best when we are focusing on something specific, such as a specific event, like a recent memory or a future imagined scenario. We then want to ask our client to notice what feeling or emotion comes up for them now in the present moment when thinking about it. It can then be useful to ask them what part or aspect of this event their mind is focusing on that is making them feel that emotion.

For example, if we are working on a recent social gathering where the client felt awkward, leading to feelings of embarrassment, we might identify the emotionally charged aspect as the look on their friend’s face when our client tried to make small talk with the party host.

Now, let’s consider the second challenge we often face in EFT. If just thinking about this memory brings up strong emotions, we can approach it gently. Using simple phrases like “Even though I feel really embarrassed just thinking about this memory, this is just where I’m at right now” can be effective.

However, if the emotional intensity isn’t so high, then “zooming in” a bit more can help the client “tune in” and activate the emotion they want to diminish or release. This might sound something like: “Even though I feel really embarrassed when thinking about this party I attended the other day, and remembering the look on my friend’s face when I was awkwardly trying to make small talk with the host, and I feel this embarrassment in my face, this is just where I’m at right now”.

Sometimes, our clients might respond with several aspects, such as “the look on my friend’s face while I was awkwardly trying to make small talk with the host, and also when I tried to dance but my body felt so stiff, and also when I had to leave the party without saying goodbye to anyone, because I was feeling so anxious”Addressing all these aspects in one round of tapping can overwhelm the client’s nervous system. Therefore, it’s more effective to ask which aspect feels most present or is calling for their attention the most, addressing other aspects in following rounds.

To summarize, effective EFT involves finding a balance. We aim to help clients connect with their emotions without overwhelming them. By focusing on specific events and addressing one or two aspects at a time, we can facilitate a safe and effective healing process.

And that’s it for today! I’m Bruno Sade, a compassionate, open-minded clinical psychologist, and certified EFT practitioner. My approach is tailored to your individual needs and preferences, always respecting your experiences, beliefs, and background.

What are your thoughts on today’s topic? How do you relate to the idea of balancing emotion in EFT? Feel free to share your experiences, questions, or suggestions for future topics. You can either leave a comment below or send a private message.

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